Wednesday, May 5, 2021

Power of Psychological Assumptions in Matchmaking Processes

Power of assumption?
Match-making processes would be markedly different for society that assumes "you are mentally ill unless proven healthy" vs the society that assumes "you are healthy unless proven mentally ill".
This is similar to the power of assumption in law:
"You are innocent unless proven guilty" vs "you are guilty unless proven innocent" through due process.
The impact on behaviors, societal norms and management processes differ tremendously in societies using the assumption "innocent unless proven guilty" (simpler open fast processes of developed countries) vs 'guilty unless proven innocent (complex convoluted opaque tedious processes of developing countries like Pakistan).

Culturally and historically parents did not use to do psychological assessment for a would be matrimonial match, why?
Because, they assumed people are sane (aqil and baligh) unless there were visible well known signs of پاگل پن.
Today, modern man is assumed to be a psychopath (a stealth Jack the Ripper or serial killer/rapist) unless proven otherwise through psychological testing 😢

Furthermore, culturally and historically matrimonial matches were only done in families that were known for generations. If not, then ancestral lines and compatibilities were checked through go betweens who would visit the families and even live with them to identify behavioral norms and lifestyle alignments.

Unfortunately or fortunately today the culture believes in love at first sight. چٹ منگنی پٹ بیاہ
Elimination of "zalim samaj" as a go-between has increased the mismatches creating the need for specialist qualified Matchmakers (substitute of zalim samaj?)

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